I took my kids Christmas shopping. I recently discovered that most of my friends (often with only two children) have their children buy Christmas gifts for one another. Just to show you how complicated this can be with four children I will make you a little chart:
A family with two children:
Kate buys for Ben
Ben buys for Kate
A family with four children:
Aidan buys for Zoe
Aidan buys for Avery
Aidan buys for Ruby
Zoe buys for Aidan
Zoe buys for Avery
Zoe buys for Ruby
Avery buys for Aidan
Avery buys for Zoe
Avery buys for Ruby
Ruby buys for Aidan
Ruby buys for Zoe
Ruby buys for Avery
Understand? What for a family with two children is two gifts, turns into twelve gifts for a family with four kids. So I convinced my kids that the best way to use the resources (ie they each had a budget of $30) was to draw names. Actually, I just assigned them names and they each bought one gift. It was fun. Which surprised me because I hate shopping and because we left this excursion until the 22 of December so I expected chaos. It was mostly good. They choose appropriate gifts for eachother and they stayed within the preset budget.
We don't need more things in our house but the act of giving was important for the children and the thoughtful preparation: choosing, buying, wrapping were important things for them to participate in. Maybe next year I will encourage them to make their gifts for eachother but this year I just didn't have the energy.
Merry Christmas to you all! And probably Happy New Year too, since it's likely I won't be back until then. Love, peace, joy and happiness from our house to yours!
Showing posts with label Christmas. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Christmas. Show all posts
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Friday, December 10, 2010
Warm Hearted
My last post was a bit on the negative side. I consider myself a mostly positive person. Except I don't want to be stepped on and I will stand up for myself and for my family. So I apologize for being so crabby. It has passed.
Yesterday some of my friends started playing a facebook meme. It is so simply sweet that I had to join in. A very simple concept: my friends were invited to send me an inbox message with a number between 1 and 100 and I would write them a message as my status that only they would know was for them. I started it as an opportunity to warm some hearts but what ended up happening was I warmed my own. It seems I had forgotten how many truly beautiful people I am surrounded by. I needed the reminder: people are good. Because often I am hermit like in nature and forget to reach out and touch the people I love (except for the five who live in my house, they are inundated with my reaching). If you have the time I suggest you try it yourself. I feel like I could conquer any adversity right now, it was empowering.
Also? I finished my Christmas cards. And I even enjoyed them this year which was a relief since I enjoyed NOT sending them so much last year that I was a bit skeptical.
Happy Friday!
Yesterday some of my friends started playing a facebook meme. It is so simply sweet that I had to join in. A very simple concept: my friends were invited to send me an inbox message with a number between 1 and 100 and I would write them a message as my status that only they would know was for them. I started it as an opportunity to warm some hearts but what ended up happening was I warmed my own. It seems I had forgotten how many truly beautiful people I am surrounded by. I needed the reminder: people are good. Because often I am hermit like in nature and forget to reach out and touch the people I love (except for the five who live in my house, they are inundated with my reaching). If you have the time I suggest you try it yourself. I feel like I could conquer any adversity right now, it was empowering.
Also? I finished my Christmas cards. And I even enjoyed them this year which was a relief since I enjoyed NOT sending them so much last year that I was a bit skeptical.
Happy Friday!
Sunday, December 5, 2010
Bah Humbug
I haven't posted in more than two weeks. In fact, I haven't written anything since I finished my NaNoWriMo novel on November 26. I haven't even looked at the 150 pages of my own novel or written a Christmas letter. I haven't written a single letter or note to my darlings. I have only tweeted, texted, and facebooked which hardly counts as writing. I miss the writing but I needed to catch up on some things, namely the house which exploded in Christmas Cheer.
Christmas Cheer makes it sound intentional. Trust me, I'm trying. Because the honest truth is: Bah Humbug. I hate the mess that Christmas makes in our little house and I hate the mass of shopping I will do over the next week, planned though it may be and happy as I am to give, the shopping part still slays me.
And then all my friends started changing their facebook pictures to cartoon characters with the disclaimer that they were doing it in an effort to stop violence towards children. And while I wholeheartedly support ending violence towards children in all capacities, I don't see what changing my profile picture will do towards that end. Today, I changed my mind: all of the changed profile pictures have brought to the table a discussion of child abuse. And discussion is ALWAYS important. Even if getting out and doing something is MORE practical, discussion leads to better awareness which tends to lead towards more DOING SOMETHING. And so, good on you all for changing your pictures.
Today I am considering the things in our lives which lead to intentional happiness and the bringing forth of Christmas Spirit. I am all in for intentional happiness. And I love that Christmas brings families together. I am looking forward to all of it. Now if only I could control the mess.
Christmas Cheer makes it sound intentional. Trust me, I'm trying. Because the honest truth is: Bah Humbug. I hate the mess that Christmas makes in our little house and I hate the mass of shopping I will do over the next week, planned though it may be and happy as I am to give, the shopping part still slays me.
And then all my friends started changing their facebook pictures to cartoon characters with the disclaimer that they were doing it in an effort to stop violence towards children. And while I wholeheartedly support ending violence towards children in all capacities, I don't see what changing my profile picture will do towards that end. Today, I changed my mind: all of the changed profile pictures have brought to the table a discussion of child abuse. And discussion is ALWAYS important. Even if getting out and doing something is MORE practical, discussion leads to better awareness which tends to lead towards more DOING SOMETHING. And so, good on you all for changing your pictures.
Today I am considering the things in our lives which lead to intentional happiness and the bringing forth of Christmas Spirit. I am all in for intentional happiness. And I love that Christmas brings families together. I am looking forward to all of it. Now if only I could control the mess.
Saturday, January 2, 2010
A (not so) Christmas letter
The New Year seems always to cause me to pause for reflection about the year past and spend a few minutes thinking about the direction I want the upcoming year to take on. This year is no different than the rest. Despite my promise to myself to live in this moment. To enjoy each and every now. To not hang my hopes on tomorrow or live a life hanging on the past. I can't help but reflect. Extrinsically I look towards the physical changes in our lives. Where are we now? This is the reflection that I usually write into a Christmas letter which I send with cards and photos to our friends and extended family. For many years this was our major form of communication, especially with our extended family. In the first few years that I wrote this letter, I used it to sum up our accomplishments and mention what our plans were for the immediate future. But it always seemed trite. Impersonal. Not reflective of the people that we really are.
As our children grow into the amazing people that they are, it seemed to be even less true of who they are. And for those people that are only a distant part of our lives, I wanted them to see, to feel, to hear and to understand us. We are certainly proud of them, interested in their various activities, but do our relations care if they are taking swimming lessons, gymnastics, ballet, piano, and cello lessons? Does anyone care about the school choirs, the chess club and the running club? Does anyone care about our family vacations or celebrations? Maybe. But then again, does it really say anything about us? Does it tell them of our hearts? Those things may matter, but only peripherally. So I started taking our smaller stories, the way one of us responded to a certain situation, something said, a small gesture, our favourite moments and writing them into our family newsletter, with hope in my heart. Hope that we would be seen and maybe understood, laughed with and loved. But our hearts were broken last year. Ditched and thrown out. We watched with our broken hearts as people we loved lost more and more, the hurt seemed never ending. But we super glued them back together and 2009 turned into a beautiful, amazing year. Our family grew and became closer and more connected. We stopped trying to make anyone else happy and we recognized that our happiness is intrinsic, that we create it ourselves with our own internal dialogue. We made moments, continue making moments.
My Christmas card list this year got smaller. And it's getting smaller seemed so ridiculous to me; I never imagined I would feel it necessary to "weed my friend garden" and stop communicating with people I once considered important to us. Couldn't imagine it. But people change and move in different directions. The different direction for me, included not sending Christmas cards. I didn't buy a single stamp. I made a few beautiful little cards to pass along as we saw friends and family at various gatherings. I took advantage of our new social media and sent Facebook messages, twitter messages and text messages to wish my friends the best of the holidays. It was freeing for me. I thought I would feel guilt and send cards at the last minute. I thought I would consider a New Year's letter or a Spring letter but I didn't, haven't, don't think I will. Some of my aunts and uncles wrote me little notes in their Christmas cards telling me how much they enjoy hearing from me. Some of them phoned to wish us a Merry Christmas and to tell us they loved us, some even called to tell me how lovely our children are and what a good job we have done as parents. All of these communications were far more meaningful than the card I could have sent.
Of course I thought about what I might write in our letter had I done so. I might have told the story from Aidan's teacher, the one about how he might be the nicest child she has ever had the privilege of teaching, how he is always considerate of his classmates feelings and how he refuses to cut his hair which makes me feel old (that I disagree with my nine year old about fashion). I would have told about Zoe being offered a speaking part in the Christmas concert, her decision to give the part to a classmate who wanted it more and then her relief when she realized how many people (including the premier) would be at her Christmas concert. I might have told about Avery's Kindergarten teacher telling me that in spite of her spirit and determination, she is one of the best five year old conflict resolvers she has met and I might have told you the story of how she tried to cut her own bangs because she wanted to look more like me. I may have told how much I am enjoying the time I have with Ruby while her brother and sisters are in school. How much we are able to do together, and how sad it makes me that I didn't have more individual time with her siblings. I may have mentioned how unbelievable it is to me that after nine (and a few months) we are finally done with diapers forever. Or how much I love the imagination games that occur in our household. Or how much we love being together, riding bikes, swimming, playing in playgrounds, road tripping, watching a movie, eating, drinking and the general merriment that exists in our house.
I probably wouldn't tell about how much time I spend helping to resolve various conflicts and I probably wouldn't have told you how ready I am to move in a different direction career wise which completely conflicts with how much I love my job. And I probably wouldn't tell about how Steve and I have worked through some tough things with our children's schooling this fall and are so happy with the outcome, so happy that our children are happy. Though I may have told about how much Steve loves his job and how amazing his workplace has been when it comes to providing quality of life for our family. And I might have told about our ongoing renovations, the garage that was just finished, our yard now beautiful the way Steve imagined it when we moved here and our plans for this year on the inside of our house. I may have tried to describe my emotional attachment to our home, but would have failed. But I likely wouldn't have told you what a pain contractors are to deal with (because most of you already know that!)
I would have written about our two beautiful nieces. How much they've grown and what amazing little people they are and how sad we are to be this distance apart. A three hour drive might not seem like much but it limits our visits to monthly instead of weekly or even daily.
We don't know what the future holds for us. I don't believe anyone does really. But our short term plans are moving forward. I have heard our upcoming trip to Disneyland with grandparents, brother and sister in law, described as the pilgrimage that North American families make and laughed because it is so true. I am looking forward to school, work, gymnastics, ballet, soccer, piano, swimming, Kindermusik, and cello resuming this coming week. But I have sure enjoyed the pause that the past couple of weeks has gifted us. The break from our routines and time for more moments: some sledding, some drawing, some painting, some playdough playing, some Lego building, some snow shovelling, some fort building, some whole days in pajamas, some visits with some of our favourite people.
Life IS beautiful. So Happy New Year to you all, and wishes that all your journeys, whatever they bring, remind you of just how beautiful your life is too.
As our children grow into the amazing people that they are, it seemed to be even less true of who they are. And for those people that are only a distant part of our lives, I wanted them to see, to feel, to hear and to understand us. We are certainly proud of them, interested in their various activities, but do our relations care if they are taking swimming lessons, gymnastics, ballet, piano, and cello lessons? Does anyone care about the school choirs, the chess club and the running club? Does anyone care about our family vacations or celebrations? Maybe. But then again, does it really say anything about us? Does it tell them of our hearts? Those things may matter, but only peripherally. So I started taking our smaller stories, the way one of us responded to a certain situation, something said, a small gesture, our favourite moments and writing them into our family newsletter, with hope in my heart. Hope that we would be seen and maybe understood, laughed with and loved. But our hearts were broken last year. Ditched and thrown out. We watched with our broken hearts as people we loved lost more and more, the hurt seemed never ending. But we super glued them back together and 2009 turned into a beautiful, amazing year. Our family grew and became closer and more connected. We stopped trying to make anyone else happy and we recognized that our happiness is intrinsic, that we create it ourselves with our own internal dialogue. We made moments, continue making moments.
My Christmas card list this year got smaller. And it's getting smaller seemed so ridiculous to me; I never imagined I would feel it necessary to "weed my friend garden" and stop communicating with people I once considered important to us. Couldn't imagine it. But people change and move in different directions. The different direction for me, included not sending Christmas cards. I didn't buy a single stamp. I made a few beautiful little cards to pass along as we saw friends and family at various gatherings. I took advantage of our new social media and sent Facebook messages, twitter messages and text messages to wish my friends the best of the holidays. It was freeing for me. I thought I would feel guilt and send cards at the last minute. I thought I would consider a New Year's letter or a Spring letter but I didn't, haven't, don't think I will. Some of my aunts and uncles wrote me little notes in their Christmas cards telling me how much they enjoy hearing from me. Some of them phoned to wish us a Merry Christmas and to tell us they loved us, some even called to tell me how lovely our children are and what a good job we have done as parents. All of these communications were far more meaningful than the card I could have sent.
Of course I thought about what I might write in our letter had I done so. I might have told the story from Aidan's teacher, the one about how he might be the nicest child she has ever had the privilege of teaching, how he is always considerate of his classmates feelings and how he refuses to cut his hair which makes me feel old (that I disagree with my nine year old about fashion). I would have told about Zoe being offered a speaking part in the Christmas concert, her decision to give the part to a classmate who wanted it more and then her relief when she realized how many people (including the premier) would be at her Christmas concert. I might have told about Avery's Kindergarten teacher telling me that in spite of her spirit and determination, she is one of the best five year old conflict resolvers she has met and I might have told you the story of how she tried to cut her own bangs because she wanted to look more like me. I may have told how much I am enjoying the time I have with Ruby while her brother and sisters are in school. How much we are able to do together, and how sad it makes me that I didn't have more individual time with her siblings. I may have mentioned how unbelievable it is to me that after nine (and a few months) we are finally done with diapers forever. Or how much I love the imagination games that occur in our household. Or how much we love being together, riding bikes, swimming, playing in playgrounds, road tripping, watching a movie, eating, drinking and the general merriment that exists in our house.
I probably wouldn't tell about how much time I spend helping to resolve various conflicts and I probably wouldn't have told you how ready I am to move in a different direction career wise which completely conflicts with how much I love my job. And I probably wouldn't tell about how Steve and I have worked through some tough things with our children's schooling this fall and are so happy with the outcome, so happy that our children are happy. Though I may have told about how much Steve loves his job and how amazing his workplace has been when it comes to providing quality of life for our family. And I might have told about our ongoing renovations, the garage that was just finished, our yard now beautiful the way Steve imagined it when we moved here and our plans for this year on the inside of our house. I may have tried to describe my emotional attachment to our home, but would have failed. But I likely wouldn't have told you what a pain contractors are to deal with (because most of you already know that!)
I would have written about our two beautiful nieces. How much they've grown and what amazing little people they are and how sad we are to be this distance apart. A three hour drive might not seem like much but it limits our visits to monthly instead of weekly or even daily.
We don't know what the future holds for us. I don't believe anyone does really. But our short term plans are moving forward. I have heard our upcoming trip to Disneyland with grandparents, brother and sister in law, described as the pilgrimage that North American families make and laughed because it is so true. I am looking forward to school, work, gymnastics, ballet, soccer, piano, swimming, Kindermusik, and cello resuming this coming week. But I have sure enjoyed the pause that the past couple of weeks has gifted us. The break from our routines and time for more moments: some sledding, some drawing, some painting, some playdough playing, some Lego building, some snow shovelling, some fort building, some whole days in pajamas, some visits with some of our favourite people.
Life IS beautiful. So Happy New Year to you all, and wishes that all your journeys, whatever they bring, remind you of just how beautiful your life is too.
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Feliz Navidad
I want to wish you a Merry Christmas. From the bottom of my heart. For us it's like Christmas Eve was when I was but a wee one. Steve's Mom's family celebrates Christmas on the Eve. Opening all their gifts and eating their celebration meal. And so today is filled with that barely containable excitement that I once felt only on Christmas Eve. I will be frantically trying to finish up the laundry, getting the suitcases packed and rechecking my lists to make sure that I haven't forgotten anything.
Yesterday, we celebrated with some of our extended family. It was lovely. And it was the only "Christmas Dinner" that I get to cook this year. Since I am working both Christmas and New Year's Eve this year, it seems only fitting that I get to celebrate early. With ham, maple syrup veggies, sweet potato soup with lime, coconut and curry, and gingerbread tea. Yum. Especially when shared with good company.
I had really wanted to write a post on the 21 of December. Winter Solstice. It is one of my favorite days of the year. Traditionally we celebrate the darkest day of the year by allowing ourselves to grieve those people, and moments lost that we need to remember from the past year or years previous. This year I had grief on my mind but outwardly celebrated Christmas with Steve's Dad and family. We drove six hours in one day, the kids watched four DVDs and I crocheted dolly blankets as gifts for them. We ate lasagne. Ruby had a nap. We talked about our jobs, our babies, or lives. Steve's dad watched some golf. It was all very peaceful. So while I was thinking of people lost this last year, and filled with the bitterness of such loss, I outwardly celebrated what we have left. There was balance and even reconciliation and recognition that we, the living continue to move forward, though sometimes in different directions.
So now I look forward to the slow return to lighter days. Long for late summer nights, remembering to enjoy the journey back to them.
Merry Christmas to all.
Yesterday, we celebrated with some of our extended family. It was lovely. And it was the only "Christmas Dinner" that I get to cook this year. Since I am working both Christmas and New Year's Eve this year, it seems only fitting that I get to celebrate early. With ham, maple syrup veggies, sweet potato soup with lime, coconut and curry, and gingerbread tea. Yum. Especially when shared with good company.
I had really wanted to write a post on the 21 of December. Winter Solstice. It is one of my favorite days of the year. Traditionally we celebrate the darkest day of the year by allowing ourselves to grieve those people, and moments lost that we need to remember from the past year or years previous. This year I had grief on my mind but outwardly celebrated Christmas with Steve's Dad and family. We drove six hours in one day, the kids watched four DVDs and I crocheted dolly blankets as gifts for them. We ate lasagne. Ruby had a nap. We talked about our jobs, our babies, or lives. Steve's dad watched some golf. It was all very peaceful. So while I was thinking of people lost this last year, and filled with the bitterness of such loss, I outwardly celebrated what we have left. There was balance and even reconciliation and recognition that we, the living continue to move forward, though sometimes in different directions.
So now I look forward to the slow return to lighter days. Long for late summer nights, remembering to enjoy the journey back to them.
Merry Christmas to all.
Saturday, December 20, 2008
JOY is...
*much like love with extra exuberance!
*the look on a child's face when someone hands her a helium filled balloon
*voices joined together in song (even more so I'm moments of spontaneity)
*the anticipation of great things to come
*letting go of hurt so fully that it no longer exists
*dancing in the living room, in the streets, in the rain and in the snow
*snow angels
*full body huggles
*smiles that cause wrinkles
It's not quiet, nor is it supposed to be. It's love lived out loud, not in secret, not behind closed doors nut with open arms and open hearts. It's the family one loves to come home to, the wholeness of heart, friends who can drop by anytime. It's like love only with exuberance!!
Wishing my small blogosphere oodles of Joy for Christmas that carries you each through the new year.
*the look on a child's face when someone hands her a helium filled balloon
*voices joined together in song (even more so I'm moments of spontaneity)
*the anticipation of great things to come
*letting go of hurt so fully that it no longer exists
*dancing in the living room, in the streets, in the rain and in the snow
*snow angels
*full body huggles
*smiles that cause wrinkles
It's not quiet, nor is it supposed to be. It's love lived out loud, not in secret, not behind closed doors nut with open arms and open hearts. It's the family one loves to come home to, the wholeness of heart, friends who can drop by anytime. It's like love only with exuberance!!
Wishing my small blogosphere oodles of Joy for Christmas that carries you each through the new year.
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Love is....
Working away on our Christmas letter. Though a little slower and a little less diligently than I would have liked. The original plan of interviewing all of my family members went well after the second attempt. For the first run I tried a casual approach, talking to my kids after school about their days as always and then throwing in some of the questions I wanted to ask. It was alright, except that they often got distracted before I was done and I wasn't writing things down so my notes later weren't quite so pure. For the second run I sat each one down individually, had a chat and took notes (which they thought was quite hilarious and I even got more than one offer to help with the writing part...I should have made it a written questionnaire and sent it out that way).
Here is what came out of the "What is Love?" question:
*hugs and kisses
*dancing around the living room
*hugs and kisses
*reading together
*hugs and kisses
*helping each other
*hugs and kisses
*caring about each others' days
*hugs and kisses
*missing each other
*hugs and kisses
*sending letters
*hugs and kisses
*maybe getting married?
*hugs and kisses
*seeing past the imperfections
*hugs and kisses
*not even noticing the imperfections
*hugs and kisses
*quiet time
*hugs and kisses
*being vulnerable and feeling safe
*more hugs and kisses
And then when the interviews were over we danced around the living room some more.
I feel like I should offer prizes for guessing who said what. Or those of you who are fortunate enough to receive our Christmas letter can just look forward to finding out. Lucky you!
We are enjoying the notes and cards and pictures that we have received over the last few days and look forward to hearing from more of you in the days to come. I think that may actually be one of my most favorite parts of Christmas. Yep, most definitely.
Here is what came out of the "What is Love?" question:
*hugs and kisses
*dancing around the living room
*hugs and kisses
*reading together
*hugs and kisses
*helping each other
*hugs and kisses
*caring about each others' days
*hugs and kisses
*missing each other
*hugs and kisses
*sending letters
*hugs and kisses
*maybe getting married?
*hugs and kisses
*seeing past the imperfections
*hugs and kisses
*not even noticing the imperfections
*hugs and kisses
*quiet time
*hugs and kisses
*being vulnerable and feeling safe
*more hugs and kisses
And then when the interviews were over we danced around the living room some more.
I feel like I should offer prizes for guessing who said what. Or those of you who are fortunate enough to receive our Christmas letter can just look forward to finding out. Lucky you!
We are enjoying the notes and cards and pictures that we have received over the last few days and look forward to hearing from more of you in the days to come. I think that may actually be one of my most favorite parts of Christmas. Yep, most definitely.
Saturday, December 6, 2008
What have we been up to?
Here are some pics from the last few days:
We made a quick trip down to visit family one weekend recently and to have a mini vacation (read: hotel with pool!)When we got to my Mom and Dad's place they had just put up their Christmas tree which the kids were more than happy to trim for them.
Ah Gingerbread! Smartest I've ever been about gingerbread...we made this house and destroyed it later the same day...icing and treats are much better when they're not all stale..
Yesterday, I got to help out a friend with three of her children so she could watch her eldest sing at City Hall. Warm fuzzies all over just thinking about how simple it was and how good it made things for both of us.
And our own tree. Up just last night...I had been dreading putting it up thinking it would require all of my attention over the next few weeks to keep Ruby from removing the decorations. Quite the contrary, Ruby is fascinated by the tree and even helped with the decorations
We made a quick trip down to visit family one weekend recently and to have a mini vacation (read: hotel with pool!)When we got to my Mom and Dad's place they had just put up their Christmas tree which the kids were more than happy to trim for them.
Ah Gingerbread! Smartest I've ever been about gingerbread...we made this house and destroyed it later the same day...icing and treats are much better when they're not all stale..
Yesterday, I got to help out a friend with three of her children so she could watch her eldest sing at City Hall. Warm fuzzies all over just thinking about how simple it was and how good it made things for both of us.
And our own tree. Up just last night...I had been dreading putting it up thinking it would require all of my attention over the next few weeks to keep Ruby from removing the decorations. Quite the contrary, Ruby is fascinated by the tree and even helped with the decorations
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